With Me

With Me

I lay in bed this night and wish to hold you. Wish to mold my body to yours and meld with each and every one of your pores as we make sweet love to scores upon scores of sweet melodies infused with passion and truth drifting upon the breeze up past my knees, and into my auricular facilities causing me to be weak in those same knees, but more so in my heart.
 
The art I have found is staying strong in those moments of love. To have the ability to rise above all my mundane and egoic tendencies, and see it for what it is when you are with me. It's like the heavens and the earth become melodically woven into a tapestry of sweet Love, and in those breaths of timelessness I am found to be alive.
 
Yet when those skies part, the art lies in the ability to maintain. To abstain from all that which makes me want to say, "what is it about her that made you say, "I think I am just going to go home today" " Yet I know whose arms in which tonight you will lay.
 
In my perfect world, this would not hinder my day. Instead it would drive me to be more in love with me, and that is what I can thank you for. For giving me moments to step to what I know is possible, to be a lover that is absolutely unstoppable. Unstoppable in the love that I have to give, but more importantly in the love that I cannot live without.
 
The love that reaches deep into my soul, the love that nourishes my flowers as they grow. The love that comes from only within. The love that teaches me consistently to win to win to win is to love, unconditionally, no matter if you are laying with me, or not. This is where the plot of my story thickens and so many are quick not to listen.
 
They think that there has to be only one, but with this much love, how can that be. Am I meant to silence my love so to be socially acceptable, so as to find a love that can't handle me in my true state of divinity. May you tonight be laying in bed thinking of me, thinking of how you would be molding your energy fine tuned to mine. May there be a sacred call to our passion, and to our divine truth. May we be as one in our dreams awakend as in our youth.
 
Truth is all that will save us now, so when I ask you tomorrow, please tell me truth because I will know, and unlike the days of my youth, I will trust what I see when I look in your heart, and herein lies another art:
 
To see with clear eyes into the heart of another, one whom we wish to discover, even if they are only a momentary lover, and not allow what we wish to see to collude with what is not in the highest good for we. The art is to see exactly as it is, not how we wish it could be. 
 
And then to accept what has been seen as a perfect manifestation of our most divine harmonic vibration, no matter how painful that seems to be, for there is a lesson of Love gifted to us in each and every one of these. If love is truly unconditional, then there is no condition that can be placed upon it, and this is it. This is the lesson that we are here to learn, the lesson that is innate from youth. 
 
Truth. Again the answer waits in truth, but not in the truth of the words we wish to hear, it waits in the way that we perceive the words that we hear. And as the years go on our ears seem to hear more and more lies coming from within the depths of what we see with our own eyes. But if we let out heart become our eyes, then we will minimize the lies that we listen to from deep within.
 
We will then have the ability to win the battle waged from within, the battle of self love, and we will real-eyes that this is no sin. For we truly win when we can look within and see love in every aspect of our being instead of fleeing to the external projections we place upon everything else.
 
When we can look into the darkest places of self, and see loves light illuminate, we create a balanced state of self affinity. And it is here we truly see there is only one self. Only one light, only one love, and this love radiates from with in, with out, from below, and above. 
 
It is here we can unconditionally give and accept true love from ourselves and from others, and we can appreciate the gifts from all of our lovers, even if those are the lovers that in the past we had seen as our teachers of great suffering.
 
For we will have seen the pendulum swing, and with this swing we will bring ourselves a state of constant accepting. Never letting our ego misconstrue love to be anything other than true. This is where she becomes me becomes you becomes one love true.
 
I will not hold it against you if she is who you are with tonight, I will give thanks and praises that I know I am more than alright because on this night I have solved one of lifes most dramatic perpetuators, I now know that I am my ultimate liberator. That I hold all that I need whether you are here in my bed with me or not in. 
 
I had forgotten and now I have gotten to begin again from the beginning of love. And I know now that there is more than enough. More than enough love for me to be alright if you are laying with me or she tonight, all I ask is for your honesty, because honestly, it is in the highest good for every being.
 
With each of us that lets go of our fear that there is not enough love, we step closer to seeing with the eyes given to us from above, the eyes in our heart at the center of our being, thus we accept the streaming of enlightening love into our heart, and this is truly the most healing art.

Forward IN Action

I am forwarding into conscious action, this is no the time for relaxin'. Right now I am asking myself, "How can I be of service to others?" To all my Sister's and all my Brother's.I am seeing that in my wanting to serve I am being absurd, by not placing myself first!As within, so without. I am learning all about, myself. And it is no coincidence that in doing this, I am, in turn serving all with my most beautiful medicine, because I have let it in! YES, I AM in Love with the reflection that I am projectin'!And now I am protecting all that is sacred. And yes, I stand before you completely naked. Exposed to my fears, exposed to my peers, exposed to all that the painting of I has now, ever been, or ever will be seen by.Time is not flying by, time is not standing still, time is an illusion consuming those with weak will. Yeah, it may seem like it took forever to get here, as I open my eyes I realize... I never left here. The here and now is all I've ever had.

a larger love

The most Beautiful Pain I have ever felt... and so my life has been changed forever... someday I will know what is to be found in the ellipsis... In this hurting, I have found healing. May my heart grow stronger with every breath. May my love radiate so as to touch all the world. Bless Thank you for allowing me to share this. My heart is still breathing out. My tears are still running in my soul, and occasionally down my cheeks. I could have never imagined the bliss of this longing... as my heart is breaking so does it make room for a larger love to shine through.

The Most Beautiful Pain

Never before have I welcomed such pain.

Never has my heart been through so much agony and been so thankful.

I live for Love and so Love I receive.

And in this Love, the Love I've learned is so pure and so free.

There will be other men for you, and other women for me, said he.

Then we agreed there will always only be one we.

There will always only be one we.

We were only we in moments so few and far between.

Otherwise he would not have been able to leave.

And so begins our reprieve.

Yes, I know we will meet again.

In these bodies on the shores of his homeland.

Many years it may be.

Many years it may be.

Yes, I have faith in this we.

Ivolution

I had to do this alone.

I had to be left in the desert with no water to drink or bathe in to real-I-ze that I had known the direction of my path all along.

And thus I walked the path into my mothers hands.

Her fingers slowly massaging up the back of Her own crusted shores.

Her healing lifeblood holding power greater than I have ever known.

I am drawn to her.

I am drawn to help her heal.

And in turn she gives me strength and determination to move Forward all ways.

The pace of my walking along this path had been silent, and in that intermission...

I found Peace.

I found Love.

I found Hope.

I found Faith.

My Mama reached out her arms and spoke my name gently behind my ear,

"Lauren, come here..."

And I listened.

I listened with every cell of my physical being.

Every cell of my emotional being.

Every cell of my mental being.

And, every cell of my spiritual being.

My entire being listened and as my Mothers voice resonated throughout my being EVERY cell was changed.

IVOLUTION: When one chooses consciously to move Forward into a higher version of themselves as one. Uniting Divine Masculine with Divine Feminine. Uniting the I's.

bass note

there is a bass note resonating at my core

this is my Mother's heartbeat

so in LOVE I am with all I experience

no, I am not angry anymore...

peace has found a way into this musical

I know it was here all the time...

so blessed am I to be alive, here, now... this life has given me so much more than I could have ever imagined. Yet, I knew what I was in for when I came, and I agreed, willingly, with a smile on my face... and thus, I live!

to tell of the enormous amount of love resonation in my being is impossible! so deep is this vibration, so radiant, most moments my heart seems as though it will burst open, fly through my chest, and bathe the world with this secret...

oh how I do love secrets, and surprises of love

my mansion of hope is built so high, as I peer out into the world from my sacred space, I find love in all that I gaze upon. no matter the circumstance, my love will prevail. my children are proof of this.

a swan is in my spirit.

her strength is immeasurable

she is my guide...

Wabazi Quay

her wings are my arms, her feathers so soft and yet powerful beyond imagination are my skin, her mothering is my mothering, her flight my freedom, her call my song.

there is a strength in my being that I have never know before, these wings unfolding show cause for a new way of life. the dawn of new days, the light rays emanating conscious flight, I have seen the worst of storms and the darkest of nights... and now...

blessings open on up to me, I have found the passion in the roots of my tree

love

LOVE

l.o.v.e.

lights omnipresent vibration everywhere

this bass note resonating at my core is resonating at your core too

let us be in harmony with the song of life...

~love~

nectar

as the great spirit conducts... how blessed is the Sky to weep so freely. the Sky faces no judgement in weeping. so great is this lesson... so blessed am I to receive such gifts from such great teachers...

my children weep so freely.

may they never forget to allow their emotions to flow as the Sky does... may they continue to be such great teachers...

I am learning... may my learning be as graceful as my teachers are wise. may my heart sing out, and pour my song over the world. may my tears bless wherever they fall. may my smile be always as radiant as now. may my sleep bring dreams...

ahhh dreams... the nectar of life